Why I Admire Josh Duggar

The media buzz around the Duggar family is disconcerting.  Here 5 young women have to relive the scandal that brought distress years ago all over again. I wouldn't write this if I thought the points had been covered by the commentators, but I think something is missing from their discussion. Josh Duggar by all accounts did some amazing things for a young man in response to his wrongdoing as a teen. I admire the character he displayed even as he made wrong choices. 

One of the things I admire most is Josh's confession. Few of us would turn ourselves in for crimes we have committed.  But by his parents' account Josh confessed his wrong doing. He also confessed it to his fiancé as well before marriage. It takes remarkable strength of character to verbalize your wrongdoings. Our natural tendency is to cover up our offenses and never properly deal with them. 

 As I think back of all the boys I have known in my past, all of them had an interest in female body as teens. Many of them I know are guilty of "copping a feel" or at least peering at girls who may have a wardrobe malfunction or wear clothes a little too tight or a little too loose. None of my network of family, friends and acquaintances would have run to admit what they had done. 

If Josh Duggar had said nothing, the acts might never have been known since the victims apparently we're all unaware. Yet, Josh's integrity resulted in consequences. You and I are also faced each day with the choice to tell the whole truth even if it may have consequences. If we fully disclose every source of income on our taxes or only take what is rightfully ours, we might have consequences we don't care to consider. If we are people of absolute integrity we will not compromise the truth.  Every act of deception has within it the power to do harm to another individual or group.  By the accounts of Josh's parents he did not compromise or try to deceive. 

Even as the scandal broke he confessed it was true to the world. How many of us would be willing to have our failures publicly exposed. How many of us would make excuses or twist the story in our favor. Josh did none of that, even though it cost his reputation and his livelihood. He was a man of character and admitted his failure. 1 John 1:9 (HCSB). If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

When Josh confessed to police he faced the judgment of our legal system and had the scrutiny of Social Services, police and the community placed on him. 

Josh paid for his own counseling to demonstrate to the victims that he was sincere in his repentance. Few criminals would pay the cost to assure their victims that there was no need for fear. 

Josh knows how much one decision can change the course of your life. His wrong decisions have cost him in terms of his reputation.   We too are faced with the same problem. One act of sin in our lives is worthy of judgment. Scripture tells us that the act of sin is a reflection of the sinful character we inherited from Adam and have to battle all the days of our lives. Even one act is deserving of eternal damnation and we can never get away from this dreadful condition we are in apart from having the righteousness of Jesus Christ applied to our hearts. Those that stand in condemnation of Josh's sin also have this inner sinful nature that must be addressed either through their own confession of sin and receiving of redemption or must allow God himself to address that sin when He judges their lives. I can be more forgiving of Josh Duggar because I know what a big sinner I am. It doesn't mean we disregard sin; it means we address it with the goal of restoration. 

Josh Duggar knows the power of that one right choice of making Jesus his Lord. His faith doesn't undo the wrongs of the past, but though he is completely guilty, he has the hope of eternity in Heaven because though his choice left him bankrupt, Jesus took the penalty of eternity in Hell he would have suffered. He is certainly being oppressed I the kangaroo courts of public opinion, but he can have peace even in the midst of this storm because of his adoption into the family of God. 

I think of how much Josh's story is like that of the Apostle Paul. He had oppressed Christians and even murdered them, but had a moment of conversions that changed the course of his life. His reputation followed him forever, but his new zeal for the Lord would establish a new reputation for him; a reputation God Hself built in his life. 

I have been encouraged by the character of the Duggar family. There may be aspects of their story that if told would disappoint me, after all  they are human and they are sinners. But I have been encouraged by their testimony to stand firm in my faith and to not let the world influence my choices but look to God to supply all my needs. 

I have mixed feelings about the continuance of the television show. As a Christian, I would like to see how dealing with this situation causes them to trust God more and to find Him faithful as they do. They will do that whether it is recorded or not. God's record is complete and it is their standing before Him that matters. 

I pray for Josh, Anna (yet another victim of this media frenzy) and their family. I pray that as God opens this new chapter of their lives that they may have God's peace and a new sense of purpose in this new circumstance. 

I pray for the victims of the acts that were committed. The victim list that grows each day as the media stories continue, not through Josh's continued acts of aggression but through the exposure, others have to endure greater disruption to their lives. 

I pray for those who have such hate and disdain for the Duggars that they may come to the end of themselves and find that God offers them the same offer of forgiveness that Josh received. They too can be rid of their anger and judgement as they realize they are on the receiving end of God's grace. 

Addendum:

This blog was written before the Ashley Madison scandal came out and I do not condone Josh's choices, I believe he can turn things around for himself. The public wants to paint this man as evil, but in fact he made choices not unlike others. We are so quick to throw stones particularly at public figures who have publicly stated they are people of faith.  We see adultery in biblical passages even from men after God's own heart. This was a sin against God, against his wife and ultimately against himself. I am glad to hear that he is getting counsel. 

After all this sad news, the one I admire most is Anna, Josh's wife for standing firm through the fire of enduring public humiliation resulting from Josh's sin. 

If all the people who had affairs in this nation would humble themselves before God and seek forgiveness from God and their spouse, I believe we would find redemption and new purpose for our lives. 

Medicaid and Veterans Aid and Attendance

Recently I sat in on a continuing education training for my certification as a financial planner. The speaker unpacked strategies to get clients qualified for benefits like Veteran Aid and Attendance and Medicaid. Often assets and income are considered in qualifying for benefits and many benefits require that you have a degradation of capacity for self care. 

The speaker outlined what the eligibility parameters were, but then suggested ways to "repackage" the financial or medical condition so that their claim would be considered favorably. Nothing presented was not illegal. For instance, if family members are providing care to allow an unwell individual to remain in the home, it is acceptable if these family members get paid for services thus reducing the discretionary income considered when being evaluated for benefits. In fact even if the in well individual has no money to pay that family member, they can direct money their way and then have the family member use that funding to pay the utilities etc. a completely legal way to recharacterize living expenses to look like care giving expenses. 

People who are anticipating needing to  access Medicaid and similar benefits know that the value of their assets are considered and that there are rules in place to look back up to five years on any gifting done to move assets from their management to someone else.  By transferring assets they can make sure that they and their families have the benefits of the wealth while also tapping the resources of the taxpayers. 

I left the presentation impressed by the creativity of the speaker and my collegues actively practicing commented that the training gave them good strategies they could use. I am ashamed to admit that it took me about five minutes to reconsider the morality of the recommendations. 

Our Medicaid and Aid and Attendance for our veterans were programs designed to benefit older people who may have become disadvantaged. We Americans don't like to see people suffer and recognized that we do have a reaponsibility to care for our neighbor. Americans are incredibly paternalistic and the social programs that have been developed reflect those core values. 

As Christians we have an even higher authority and the principle to apply is that of honesty and integrity.  Our God calls us to be responsible stewards and that includes not taking money that is not rightfully ours. The programs were organized to assure the public that those who are able to pay for services pay their way and those who are unable get assistance to maintain essential needs. 

Exodus 20:15 tells us that we should not steal and Exodus 20:17 says that we should not covet what belongs to someone else. When we redirect assets and income to qualify for public benefits like this we are disobeying God's commands and we are effectively communication a message that we should not only be entitled to our resources but also someone else's. One of the deceptions prevalent is that legal benefits available whether it is public benefits, bankruptcy, or debt settlement don't harm anyone. In fact we are taking money from other people to have greater benefits for ourselves. These practices of using the system are the reason that our legal system and regulations have become increasingly complex. Every time  new legal strategies are embraced, new laws have to be erected to plug the hole in the program to keep the integrity in place. 

As people bearing the name of Christ, our mission should be for absolute honesty and integrity. We have to account to our Lord for our choices here. I pray you will choose the high road. 

May God richly bless you as you seek Him and as you serve Him. 

Abandonment of Marriage

Recently, our local news station posted an article on the reason that marriages no longer work. I will post the link for you to read for yourself, but the primary reasons given were related to intimacy and finances. People just don't connect with each other on a deeply personal basis; technology has changed the dynamic of our interactions. Financially, the cost of education has crippled many financially and they cannot make enough to support a family and pay their debts. 

I would like to address the intimacy part first. Marriage is organized for intimacy. I believe it is the closest thing we will ever come to knowing the love of God. Two imperfect people, different in so many ways are drawn together for life. A three cord strand not easily broken, we cling together through the trials and hardships of life. In marriage we have a companion to experience life with us and support us through the deep valleys and rejoice with us on the mountain-tops. 

I admit when I married, I was so naive. I had no idea what commitment I was making. I couldn't know. I was drawn to my husband by a deeper personal connection. He could seem to understand my drives, my goals in life, he accepted me warts and all. I was drawn to his creativity, loyalty and passion. No matter what he faced he would work at it until he saw solution. No problem unsolved. We had a connection and we acted on it. 

Marriage is important in God's eyes. In the Bible it is regarded in highest esteem and violations of that covenant are met with harsh judgement. It is the one relationship where you are completely exposed and vulnerable yet loved. I don't think the relationship can be duplicated without the marriage covenant because the partners have no commitment to remain together. When storms of life or bad behavior cause one partner to question the wisdom of staying together there is no obligation to stay. There is no sense of unconditional love that bears all things believes all things; the true love all of us crave. Without marriage we give up hoping for that kind of love. 

We now have more than 1/2 of our children being born in families of unmarried couples. These children often do not have a father present in their lives and do not know the security of having mom at home when they arrive home from school or the joy of going to a ballgame, fishing or hunting with dad. The one factor that seems to contribute to poverty the most is single parenthood. If people think they can't afford to be married, imagine the costs of single living. Far too many couples leave their marriages for financial reasons all to find themselves worse off after divorce. 

Security is greatest when there are two parents present. Even if there are no children, the cost of living separately is greater. The true condition that causes marriages to fail or never happen in the first place is that we are selfish by nature. We like things our way and we stubbornly refuse to accommodate someone else. God ordained marriage that we would learn how to really love. God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son to save a sinner like me. God has not required that level of sacrifice on my part, but he does allow conflict and hardship to whittle away at my hardness so that I can become more like my Lord. 

The greatest achievements do not come without commitment and sacrifice. If we choose to abandon these qualities and avoid marriage, we choose to settle for a life of little impact. A life of mediocrity. 

Just a final thought. At the very time when heterosexual young adults are abandoning marriage, homosexual couples are desperately fighting for their right to unite and legitimize their relationships. This unionizing of gay couples will further degrade the covenant of marriage. Marriage is a holy covenant made before God. To ask God to bless what He has clearly spoken against is blasphemy. God will be the one to judge our nation of we deface the marriage covenant. This month our courts will determine whether we will nationalize same sex marriages and force recognition of legitimacy in every state.  If marriage doesn't work, why bother with such dramatic actions?  

http://www.13newsnow.com/story/life/2015/04/07/5-reasons-we-cant-handle-marriage-anymore/25441065/

May God richly bless you as you seek Him and as you serve Him. 

Minimum Wage Increases: do they help?

Today across the nation minimum wage increases from $6.55 to $7.25. Before taxes that can add another $28 per week into your paycheck of low income families or about $1,450 per year. That is a nice 10% increase in their wages.

As a Christian, I believe that it is the obligation of the Christian community to care for their poor and widows. The Bible gives us many examples of ways the poor were to be cared for in both the Old Testament and the New. There were commands to leave some of the harvest on the ground for the poor to glean. There was the practice of releasing the poor from their debts every 7 years and the year of Jubilee where their possessions were restored every 50 years.

As a budget coach and a volunteer with Crown Financial Ministries, I have great compassion for the financial struggles. I believe the challenges are greater now than they were even several years ago. More and more constraints to the budget degrade the American lifestyle and even force families into financial instability.

Studies show that families need hourly wages of $12 - $16 per hour (depending on the number in your family and where you live) just to live independently. In my ministry work and now in my profession, my goal is to help families get the education and skills they need to sustain them. As God's people we should invest our efforts in pleasing Him by using our skills and our wealth wisely I hope to encourage families to do just that. I recognize that there are circumstances in which individuals are not able to overcome their poverty and that is where the church needs to be much more active than it has been. That will be a topic for another blog.

Raising minimum wage has some significant negative consequences that dramatically affect the welfare of the low income worker:

1. Employers pass their increased costs on as increased prices for product. Let's say you work for a retailer that pays minimum wage. They sell low cost products to families like you. Since minimum wage is increased 10%, the employer needs to pass on that cost increase to its customers. This has a compounding effect as the product they purchase from wholesalers is also now increased because their employees got an increase in salary. The wholesalers also had to pay more for their product because the manufacturers had an increase. The manufacturers had to pay more for their parts because their suppliers had an increase. You can see that the increases grow. 
2. Cost increases do not stop at the minimum wage worker: The employer must consider the performance and seniority increases that other workers have received over time as well in order to maintain an incentive to employees to strive to move up the wage scale through hard work and diligence. If you were making $7.25 because of your hard work prior to the increase, is it fair to now bring all employees up to your wage scale and not keep your incentive in place? The employer must give wage increases across the wage scale to keep the incentives in place so their costs don't just increase for the minimum wage workers but for all costs.
3. New incentives exist to use foreign inputs: If all the manufacturers have a 10% increase in the cost of materials and their wages increased by 10%, they need to sell their products now for even more than 10% perhaps up to 20% more. As a wholesaler who has to pay for this increase, I am now incentivized to look to a less costly product to fill that need. Where can I look? Overseas. Because we are more and more a global economy, foreign products are more easily exchanged for those that were American made. That means the supply inputs and the manufacturing work goes to foreign workers and more Americans are out of work; Americans who used to work for low wages now find they are unable to find work at any price.
4. Quality of products are degraded: In order to remain competitive, your retailer may be forced to purchase lesser quality products in order to keep business. That means that the things you purchase every day now may have less value but they cost the same. Everyone's quality of life becomes degraded as a result. Quality products are less affordable, so merchants who sell higher quality products may have to either choose to degrade their inventory or close their doors.
5. Products purchased by low income workers are more expensive: The low income worker may find that they are not any better off than they were in the first place because they need to now pay more for their burger, groceries, household goods, services, and utilities. If they received a 10% increase, but the cost of products go up in price by 10% they are actually worse off, because of the taxes that are paid on top of the purchase are greater and further reduce the amount of money in the low income worker's pocket.

Raising minimum wage is meant to help the low income worker, but it cannot serve it's purpose. The working poor are not helped by minimum wage increases. The only way they are helped is to improve their education and skills so they can qualify for higher paying positions. Minimum wage should be a beginning point for a wage earner not the level at which they exist long term. The American dream of opportunity for all people was based on that concept.

I believe that Christians need to become more involved in the lives of the poor and the struggling widows. We need to support them in their time of need and help them to get more opportunity. Churches can develop better outreach in their neighborhoods if they are extending the love of Christ in practical ways that the unbelieving community around them can see. Consider how you can put Christ's love in action today. If you want to find out how your church can become more involved reaching the needs of your members and beginning an outreach to the community, feel free to contact me at www.eternal-values.com.